You know it’s coming. The proposal. The big moment. You’ve spent months (years?) curating the perfect Pinterest board of diamond rings, color-coordinated bridal party aesthetics, and first-dance song contenders. But while you’re busy dodging your mom’s not-so-subtle “any news?” texts and perfecting your shocked-but-not-too-shocked engagement reaction for Instagram, have you thought about your financial future?
Yeah, yeah, I get it. Talking about money isn’t nearly as fun as taste-testing wedding cakes or daydreaming about your honeymoon in Santorini. But financial compatibility is just as important as knowing whether your partner prefers pineapple on their pizza. So before you dive headfirst into monogrammed towels and joint bank accounts, here are ten ways to get your money goals in sync before you say “yes.”
1. Figure Out What’s in Your Wallet (Literally)
Before you start planning a future together, take a peek at what’s going on in your financial life right now. Do you have student loans hanging over you like a bad ex? Are you a loyal credit card points hacker, or do you pretend bank statements don’t exist? Get real about your numbers, debt, savings, credit score, because love may be blind, but your financial reality shouldn’t be.
2. Have “The Talk” (No, Not That One)
Before you start merging playlists and Amazon Prime accounts, it’s time for a serious money convo. Grab some coffee (or wine, depending on how intense this is about to get) and talk about everything: spending habits, financial goals, and how you both feel about splitting expenses. You don’t need to agree on every little thing, but understanding each other’s financial mindset is key.
3. Set Some CoupleGoals (That Aren’t Just About Matching Pajamas)
Beyond the cute Instagram captions and engagement selfies, what does your financial future look like? Do you both dream of buying a house with a wraparound porch, traveling the world, or retiring at 45 to open a rescue farm for senior dogs? Aligning your big-picture goals now will help you avoid those “Wait, you want to buy a timeshare in Florida?” moments later.
4. Decide How You’ll Split the Dough
Ah, the age-old debate: one joint account or separate finances? There’s no one-size-fits-all answer, but this is the time to discuss how you’ll manage household expenses. Will you split things 50/50? Proportionate to income? Create a “fun money” fund for those random Target runs? Find what works for both of you before things get complicated.
5. Get a Sneak Peek at Each Other’s Spending Habits
Before you tie the knot, do a “spending audit” of each other’s habits. This is less about judgment and more about understanding. Are you a budget queen while he’s out here impulse-buying limited-edition sneakers? Knowing where your money goes can prevent future fights over that mystery DoorDash charge.
6. Create an Emergency Fund (Because Life Happens)
Fairy tale romances are great, but reality includes flat tires, unexpected medical bills, and that one time your apartment flooded because you “forgot” to fix the leaky sink. Having a solid emergency fund (ideally 3-6 months of expenses) ensures that when life throws you a curveball, you won’t have to rely on your credit card or your parents to bail you out.
7. Check Your Financial Love Language
Are you a saver while your partner is a spender? Do you believe in budgeting down to the last penny, or are you more of a “let’s just see what happens” kind of person? Financial harmony is about compromise, so figure out your money personalities and find a way to meet in the middle.
8. Start Talking Retirement (Yes, Even If You’re Still Paying Off Your College Bar Tabs)
I know, retirement sounds like something Future You can worry about, but starting early is key. Discuss your long-term savings strategies, 401(k) contributions, and whether you want to retire on a beach or in a cozy mountain cabin with three rescue cats. The earlier you plan, the less stressful it will be later.
9. Make a Plan for Handling Family Money Drama
Whether it’s a cousin asking for a “small loan” or future in-laws with Opinions on how you should spend your money, prepare for potential family financial drama. Set boundaries early. You can’t fix everyone’s money problems, and you shouldn’t feel guilty for prioritizing your own financial well-being.
10. Remember, a Wedding Is a Party, Your Marriage Is the Main Event
Yes, weddings are magical and beautiful (and, let’s be real, expensive). But while you’re planning the perfect reception, don’t forget to invest in the actual marriage part. Prioritizing financial conversations now can help ensure your love story has a happy (and financially secure) ever after.
Final Thoughts (and a Call to Action!)
Navigating finances before engagement isn’t exactly rom-com material, but it’s one of the best ways to set yourself up for success. So, future brides, what’s your biggest financial concern before saying “yes”? Drop your thoughts in the comments, bonus points if you share a hilarious money-related relationship story!