So, you’ve been dodging the question from nosy aunts at Thanksgiving, strategically avoiding the Pinterest rabbit hole, and side-eyeing every mysterious dinner reservation your boyfriend makes. Girl, we get it. Society acts like engagement is the ultimate level-up in life, like a final boss battle in a rom-com where you emerge victorious with a rock on your finger and a perfectly curated Instagram caption. But before you go full Say Yes to the Dress mode, let’s talk about you, specifically, what you should accomplish before officially entering the land of joint tax filings and awkward in-law visits.
Because, trust us, before you become a “we,” you should make sure your “me” is thriving. So here are 10 personal goals to check off your list before you say yes to the ring.
1. Master the Art of Saying No
Before you say yes to forever, make sure you can confidently say no, to plans you don’t want to attend, to toxic friendships, and most importantly, to anyone who thinks you need to get married by a certain age. If you can’t say no to a bridesmaid dress you secretly hate, how will you ever stand your ground when your future MIL suggests a vintage lace tablecloth theme for your modern wedding?
2. Learn How to Fix (Basic) Adulting Problems
Marriage is a team effort, but you shouldn’t need your partner to handle every minor inconvenience. Before you commit, make sure you can:
- Unclog a drain (because Drano is not a personality trait)
- Change a tire (or at least fake confidence while calling AAA)
- Make a budget that doesn’t involve “manifesting money”
3. Travel Solo (At Least Once)
Before you share your life (and a bathroom), take a trip alone. It doesn’t have to be Eat, Pray, Love level, but at least go somewhere without consulting another person on dinner plans. The confidence boost is unmatched, and you’ll learn important survival skills, like how to aggressively ignore catcallers in another language.
4. Have a Signature Drink & a Go-To Karaoke Song
Your life shouldn’t be a rom-com, but it helps to act like you’re in one. Find a drink that makes you feel like the main character (whether it’s a classic margarita or a chai latte with a double shot of espresso), and a karaoke song that ensures you own the stage every time. Bonus points if you can convince a bachelorette party that you are, in fact, Taylor Swift.
5. Build a Life That You Actually Love
Before getting engaged, ask yourself: If I never got married, would I still be happy with my life? If the answer is “meh,” you have some work to do. Get a hobby that isn’t just scrolling through engagement rings on Etsy, invest in your career, and decorate your space in a way that makes you feel like a Pinterest-worthy goddess, not someone waiting for a plus-one.
6. Get Comfortable Talking About Money
You know what’s sexier than a perfect proposal? A solid financial plan. Before merging accounts, be honest about your spending habits (yes, even the ones involving mystery Target runs). Learn how to budget, talk about debt, and set financial goals, because love is cute, but credit card debt is not.
7. Survive a Holiday Season Without Melting Down
Holidays bring out the best in twinkling lights, and the worst in family dynamics. If you can navigate Thanksgiving without throwing a dinner roll at a relative, you’re ready for in-law life. Practice deep breathing, deflect nosy questions with strategic sarcasm, and always have an exit strategy for family events that go south.
8. Know What You Actually Want in a Partner
Not what your mom wants, not what Instagram makes you think you want, but what you want. A dreamy proposal doesn’t mean much if the person proposing doesn’t support your goals, respect your boundaries, or understand why Harry Styles is an important cultural icon. Before saying yes, ask yourself: Am I choosing love, or just checking off a life milestone?
9. Figure Out Your Non-Negotiables
Sure, compromise is key in relationships, but some things should be set in stone before marriage, like:
- How you feel about kids (Not the “let’s see in five years” kind of discussion)
- Your expectations for work-life balance (Because “I’ll change after marriage” is the biggest scam of all time)
- Your hard no’s, like sharing a toothbrush, or watching a horror movie alone at night
10. Perfect Your “Engagement Announcement” Caption
Look, we know it’s coming. You’re going to post the ring. Your childhood best friend will comment OMG crying, and your random coworker will send three heart emojis. But before that moment, you need a caption that avoids tragic clichés like “I said yes!” (Groundbreaking.) Consider options like:
- “Finally upgrading my jewelry game.”
- “BRB, planning a wedding instead of working.”
- “Plot twist: He put a ring on it.”
Final Thoughts (Before You Say Yes)
Engagement is exciting, but it’s not a finish line. It’s a checkpoint in your life, and you should arrive at it as a whole person, not just someone waiting to be chosen. So before saying yes, make sure you’ve said yes to your own growth first.
Now, tell us, what’s your pre-engagement bucket list? Drop your thoughts in the comments, because let’s be real: we all need one more thing to procrastinate with before wedding planning chaos begins.