So, you’re practically engaged. The Pinterest boards are full, your left hand mysteriously finds its way into every conversation, and your family has stopped asking if it’s happening and started asking when. But before you dive headfirst into picking wedding hashtags (#FinallyAFerguson, anyone?), let’s talk about something important: travel.
Because while you and your almost-fiancé might be madly in love, if one of you dreams of backpacking through Europe and the other thinks a trip to the grocery store is “adventurous enough,” we have a situation. You don’t want to find out post-ring that his idea of a dream honeymoon is a cabin in his hometown (no shade to Ohio, but, girl…). So let’s make sure you’re on the same page before the engagement photoshoot.
1. The “Dream Vacation vs. Realistic Budget” Talk
Sure, you may have envisioned sunrise yoga in Bali, but if his idea of “budget travel” involves sleeping in a van, you need to chat. Start by casually bringing up your actual travel priorities, luxury or budget? Adventurous or relaxing? Instagram-worthy or “I refuse to take pictures”? A little transparency now saves future fights over whether you’re splurging on a villa or roughing it in a roadside motel.
2. Is He a “Spontaneous Traveler” or a “Spreadsheet Traveler”?
You know the type: some people like to book a flight, throw stuff in a suitcase, and figure it out. Others plan down to the minute, with color-coded itineraries. If you’re dreaming of whimsically hopping on a train to Paris while he needs a Google Doc for everything, you may need a compromise. (Tip: let him plan one day, and you get to embrace the chaos the next.)
3. The “Family Vacation Expectations” Trap
PSA: If he thinks every holiday means a trip to visit his parents in Florida, it’s best to clarify that before you assume anniversaries will be spent in Santorini. Discuss which vacations should be just you two and which ones will involve Uncle Bob’s unsolicited life advice over Thanksgiving dinner.
4. The Instagram vs. “Live in the Moment” Debate
Look, we all know the struggle: do you wake up at 6 a.m. to get that Eiffel Tower pic without the crowds, or do you sleep in because it’s vacation? If your ideal trip involves aesthetic reels and perfectly curated travel outfits, but he thinks taking pictures “ruins the experience,” set expectations now. There’s a happy medium, maybe you get your photoshoot moment, and he gets an hour of “no phones” time.
5. The “Adventure Level Compatibility” Test
Before you commit to forever, figure out whether his definition of “adventure” matches yours. Does he think trying sushi is “pushing the limits” while you’re booking skydiving excursions? This is important, babe. No one wants to spend their honeymoon in a debate over whether a hike with “moderate difficulty” is a death sentence or a warm-up.
6. The “We Have PTO, Let’s Use It” Agreement
One of you may think vacations are for twice a year, max. The other? Already Googling how to hack airline miles for monthly getaways. Align your travel goals now, because you don’t want to be in Year Five of marriage wondering why he only wants to travel “when it’s absolutely necessary.” (Sir, a weekend getaway is necessary.)
7. The “Honeymoon Sneak Peek” Strategy
Before you get too caught up in wedding wedding wedding, talk about your honeymoon. It’s the first test of your travel styles, so discuss expectations now. Beach resort or big city? Action-packed or laid-back? If he says, “We’ll decide later,” consider this your moment to remind him that later means after you book non-refundable flights.
Final Thoughts (Before You Go Book That Trip)
If you’re about to spend your life with someone, you should probably agree on how you’re spending that life, preferably somewhere fun with good WiFi and room service. So talk about it now, laugh through the differences, and maybe, just maybe, you’ll avoid an existential crisis at an airport gate.
What about you? Have you and your almost-fiancé tackled the great travel debate? Drop your funniest travel argument (or best compromise) in the comments, because we all need the tea.